C'est La Vida Loca

all in due time...
here i am updating again and using my hurt finger to type because I am determined to get a decent sized update for yous.
okay so ill just do this,
first the good, then the bad then the ugly.

good:
i moved out of my parents house
bad:
they plotted my removal from the house
ugly:
they didnt let me take my son with me and left me with no choice but to let him stay with them for the sake of his emotional and physical happiness.

good:
i am with a wonderful man named adam and we are completely in love.
bad:
im still married to my babys daddy
ugly:
im still married and cant divorce because of insurance reasons. but in that department its all good.

good:
my makeup business is going well. Ive been doing alot of new things, making good money and updating my portfolio.
bad:
no bad
ugly:
only before i get the makeup on em.

good:
im still in cosmetology school
bad:
ive still got 8 months to go.
ugly:
i dont really like hair that much.

good:
aidan is doing great, he is a year and a half now very smart, energetic, a really good child.
bad:
i dont see him nearly enough
ugly:
im missing my son grow up.

okay that about sums it up for now...my life is a real cluster fuck right now and has been so i do apologize for my absence...but i know you guys know me and can relate. so hang in there with me folks.
i am patient, i am stronger than anyone could ever imagine. even myself. I will pull through all of this WITHOUT meds ha ha and damnit i will get the absolute pleasure of telling my crazy fucked up parents and all those who ever doubted me to kiss my rich white ass.

so its all good, at the same time bad, and ugly just makes it interesting.
love you guys.

its good to be back.

YOOOOOOOOh!
im back to updating...let me gather my thoughts to update later...but hey im here kkk!

its been over a year...
and im about to start smoking again.

my life is just that crazy right now.

its the only thing i can think to do so i dont pull my fucking hair out.

kisses.

me'

blueberries and catfish oh mY
so i drove to texas on friday and here i is. in good ole nacagdoches ( the g is silent) and we lucked it up and the blueberry festival here in oldest town in texas. right on. so the 10 hour drive was long but not too bad and im getting fat you guys seriously today i munched on blueberrry pancakes, corndogs, catfish, chips, BEER. oh my goodness please make it stop. well thats what family reunions are for right? its so peaceful and countryish out here bugs and sticks and trees and fresh air its the bizzle yo!
aidan is doing wonderful he is really responding to all the good energy and just being loved on he is eating like a horse and making eyes at all the pretty ladies..he is just a doll and im sooo in love.
its wayy past my bedtime just thought id share the gooey love mush im experiencing.
yall come back nah ya har?

long overdue apologies
am i just crazy? yep i sure am. i am considering writing a letter to a 2 year old employer who i worked with in brooklyn. a sandwich shop mind you, and aplogize to "uncle frank" and "frankie ha ha" about cussing out their nephew. it still bothers me to this day that i called him a spic and he isnt even mexican. it bothers me most i didnt get the racial slur correct but either way im taking care of that today.
this whole last week was shit, piss, and bobblesmack. <--i give you permission to use that word in a sentence today.
i wont even go into explitives otherwise we'd be here a while and you'd probably cry for me.

casiocasanova!!! i am going to try to come and see your show tonight i swear! i am going to stick to my word for once in 2 years youll see! youll seeeeeeeeee!

in 4 to 5 months, i am moving back to cali to go live with david again. the last time we were together in cali it was wonderful. and we really grew up alot in the last 4 years together...it means so much to us now to be together and i will finish school out there.

aidan is gettin his toofer in and gah doggit im saw prud uh him im jus gushin yall.

yobitches its wack.

cali love
hey peeps. im in cali. i chowed an in an out burger last night after a long flight from NC to San Diego with Aidan. picture this...me with my only carry on a diaper bag and my new 50 dollar shirt with baby food on it, aidan squirming and chilling on the plane with me..it was semi hellish but aidan was such a good baby! he rocks. im here with david now. its nice weather, beautiful feelings. we are going to sea world sometime this week and i have a massage david set up for me. he is my penquin. i love him dearly im so in love with him right now.
okay gotta go.
adios !

its just this one thing and i was so with it...
if you dont understand the subject line iz all good thats a song. but in the song, i have no idea what that one thing is..
lot like today. its this one thing one minute to the next that could just totally make me blow up and im doing pretty good to hold it all together. stress. grr. but not too bad its over now. im chilling, drinking chai tea latte, updating you all pretty studs and godesses.
alicia got out of rehab today. so today is actually the first day of rehab. i give her a month. but we shall see. i know i hate to sound so lacadacious about it but i just know her and thats that. im over it really.

tonight i have a midterm. wish me luck, chuck! this coming up weekend, i have to work at at "blackabees"[<--swear thats what EVERYONE calls it] sat and sun so yeah ill be beat down tired most of the weekend. then off to another fun filled week! dont let my sarcasm pour all over you through the computer please.
next weekend ill be working sat and sun here in huntsville demo-ing dove products in walmart yall come and see me now mmmkay! im gonna big boy half of it all so ill have hair and body products stocked up for a year! hell yueah.
tonight i think ill have a drink with friends after class. i do think i deserve it!
aight im out for now...

go check out my portfolio if you like..its my makeup skills yo.

www.onemodelplace.com/Lvlione04/

hopefully that works copy and paste like dat old school elmers glue.

Current Mood: feeling sweeet

oh baby hack it to me!

guh i just looked at the paris hilton hacky thing...its kinda lame. yeah id love to call the photographer david lachappelle or eminem but damn i wouldnt call them if THEY didnt give me their number??! how lame is that?? people are so stupid. the only thing i got out of this bit of gossip is that i am really wanting one of tmobile things! they look great. other than the potential hacking but i doubt someone will hack mine.

anyways life is good. and fast and busy. tonight i have a HUGE fashion show at the huntsville depot roundhouse im doing the makeup for 25 models. so crazy. but gooood money.hopefully ill go out afterwards to celebrate. anyone going out? maybe ill see ya k!

other than that oh yeah..my car is an 94 eagle vision baby. big tima.

drama drama drama!
ugh. i have so many things to be happy for in my life right now, I have Aidan, my car, going to school, me and david are working things out...everything in my life is going swimmingly...but all that is occuring around me makes me feel like shit.
for instance, last night, at 1 am i am startled awake to find my sister has taken my car, is drunk as shit and we have to pick her up in south huntsville at a party. now, as a old timey party animal myself, i would understand. but this is so bad you guys she is out of control. and she has MY NEW CAR!! not to mention she just got a DUI about 3 weeks ago. so here i am in a high speed chase after picking her up, (2am here) and cops, and drunk idiots and her yelling then trying to attack me...lets just say she is the thorn in my pretty side and today i believe she has checked herself into bradford. i am not an advocate of rehab. but this child is a hellion!! we'll see she is there now i am not sure if insurance will cover her ass but if it does she is gone at least for 28 days. maybe ill get some well deserved peace for a while.
other than that things are good in my hood. my new car is sweeet. other than the jello shots i had to clean out of them today because of the drama from last night (dont ask i have no idea how they got there either) and school is rockin. i can cornrow, do a french braid, and now im doing roller sets. the only thing is i often feel out of place and i KNOW i am a lot smarter ( beauty industry wise) than the other girls but i dont look down on them at all because i know there are defenitely some things they can teach me. and if they would ever hash out their pride parade i could teach them some good business skills, makeup tips, etc.
aidan is doing great he is almost 6 months now and about 20lbs. he is just magic!! have i said that yet?? he is my life, my joy my everything. OH YEAH! i got my pell check in!! 1519 bucks!! woah i didnt ever have that much money before i was literally dancing and singing and jumping at the mailbox and i did they ghetto 'HAIILLELLUGHH GEEEEZUZZZZ" for the whole neighborhood to see.

im rich bitch im a real big tima!

ima go ahead an do diz
so i better hurry up and do a quick update because damn i have been suuper busy and havent updated in a long time! things are going good and very busy like i said school started on jan. 5th and ive been going 5 nights a week since then. cosmetology school is obviously going to be really easy..i just cant wait to get into the nitty gritty. right now its bullshit braiding and lah de dah crap. jf drake is an alright school but usually im the only white chick in class but thas cool i just turn on my ghetto and i fit right in. im sooo ghetto...uh huh.
aidan is doing great is he is coming on 5 months old now and 20 lbs. he is teething now so its always the oragel and baby tylenol...but he is a joy and a cutie. ive been teaching him to flirt and 'the eyebrows' so thats a laugh. my xmas and new years was nice i was home alone with my dad (which still means i was alone pretty much) and i played santa with aidan. new years sucked i spent it at humpeys and ugh i just wish i was in new york i try not to think about it but i miss it alot.
sooo...i have a to do list a mile long and this was one of em.not like lj is a chore but i promise to update more.
loveyall.

and a happy new year to you allz
wasup everyone. long time no type once again. i swear one of my resolutions is to get on here more often and conversate with you all and tell you about my so called life from time to time. things have gotten a little more hectic and lot less crazy lately. well, im bullshitting things are ALWAYS crazy but im learning to handle it all better i guess you could say.
xmas was nice but not as lavish and done up as a well dressed hooker like most years. this year, my mom and sis (alicia, the youngest 18) was in italy. my mom says my sis has hooked up a 37 year old italian named reno, and in the end, thats what we all meant by broadnening her horizons, right?? my xmas was alright but i have a feeling my girlfriends will surely end up getting me SOMETHING right? D (Aidans dadda) came to visit that was freaking lovely. at least its all over thats good news.
aidan is spoiled but good spoiled with love and kisses and great baby einstein shit and clothes and lots of playtime.
im doing alot of makeup lately and i quit my job at applebees on xmas eve but they want me back so hey, maybe ill go back. like a bad ex, i keep going back.
gee, im trying to think of cool shit that has happened but i guess the only thing i can come up with is that i lost 75 lbs!! thats pretty cool but im not celebrating for real until i lose at least 20 more then ill be happy.

then ill be happy, right?!

casiocasanova hey baby i miss you too.
i miss all youz guyz.

school starts jan 3rd. im halfway excited. not all the way yet. well see.

oh glorious turkey day...
so happy thanksgiving everyone. there i said it.
im thankful for my aidan and my family and my sanity.
the rest can fuck off. oh except you guys im thankful for you faithful friends.

on another note. im that hypocritical biatch that just stops updating her journal when things are awry.
but it hasnt been bad, just busy. im busy with work and trying to make my freelance job SOAR to heights unimaginable to mankind. so doing that is breathtakingly overwhelming. i get too involved in things, worry, stumble, and fret over them until i hate the mere thought of it so much i give up. so for now i am resting on making brochures, cold calling brides, and bother with doing the makeup of everyone in the 35801 area code.
until after thanksgiving and the food hangover thereof, i am on mini vacation. ( but i know i wont really be ill still be thinking bout it.)
anyways, i did the damn thing today. i made the stuffing,(the real shit not that nasty stove top shit) and the cranberry sauce (why did i buy 12 cans of that mess?) oh and went to my work 'thanksgiving'...
i guess i should be thankful that applebees still wont fire me even though im routinely late and only work 2 days a week at the most.
ha. im so happy right now though really dont let my satire fool you.
life is good. i am studying right now for a compass test coming up and seeing how i suck suck suck at math im studying to just PASS prealgebra section. and you can have a calculator and its multiple choice. still the odds are bad for me. i shouldnt have staying 24-7 stoned in highschool. oh well.
c'est la vie.

Happy turkeyday YALL.

i just discovered rich text

i am really excited. i am on the rich text prompt.

i never realized this was a possiblity! also, ive lost 11.5lbs in the last month, along with 14.5 inches all over body wise. thank GOD. Ive been working my ass off literally. i hope to lose about 50 more pounds till im back to "normal". at this point that should be pretty easy. but lets just work on the next 11. ive been working my tail off too in the more figurative sense getting a project started where i am pretty much organizing and designing a calendar for Alabama A&M. Ill be the key makeup artist, stylist, advertising exec, and promoter. all while working two jobs and taking care of a 2 month old. holy shit i never really think about it but i am a busy gal. not to mention i start school in january! woo HOO! 2 months to go! ill be going to JF Drake Tech to complete my cosmetology degree! then ill be official. hellz yeah.

( pics of me and aidan )

Current Mood: happy busy and tired

HELP HELP!!!
okay. so im wanting to build a webpage/website for my makeup artistry business. i have absolutely no idea what i am doing and would like to do this free as possible! does anyone know how i can build a simple website with my pics so that i can show everyone my portfolio online?? help is appreciated!

well hell then
so my computer crashed the other day. raise your hand if this happened to you?? i see you baby! shakin that azz! now it is squeaky clean and new (on the inside) and thank goodness cause this baby is running like a porshe now! i dont got not volvo biatch!
onto my life as of now. today i got into a fight with my sister. no, not a "hey bitch ill kill you" more like a knock down dragout type i "slapped her and hit her in the face now my arm is bloody type fight". i still throw down if thats what you are asking. yes sir. she pissed me off.
that fight has been brewing for months now so ill just be glad to say she is completely off my list of people to talk to and yes i dont care. i know i know im a mommy, i should be more patient i should be all sweeet and nice. no FUCK that. she disrespected me and aidan by turning the music up supremely loud in the car, then calling me a "fat ass"...hello i just had a child..and then ugh. i not even getting into it.
ive been really busy lately as well. i have been working two jobs. this last weekend i had to do a thing in birmingham for this marketing agency ive been working for. its a posh job. hotels, free stuff all that. pretty sweet. and sat. and sun i had to work at applebees. ugh. that job sucks but cant say i hate the steady cash in mah hand thats sweeeeet lady bugs.
so this weekend, im going to see velvet revolver along with "working". cant wait.
what else, ummm...oh yeah, i got aidan this cute cute superman outfit at party city for his halloween costume! RIP mr. reeves, now you may walk in heaven.. youre the real superman to me!
now what should i be?? all i know is i am going to get this halloween makeup kit and do some work on my mom and dad. first it will be bruises, then cuts, then old people. should be fun. i know they will like looking beat up. why?? dont ask. i just figure thats kinda fun to be all bloody and no pain. but anyways im doing it for my portfolio. gotta put it online finally thats KEY>
oh and what the heck should i be for halloween?? something unscary. cant scare the children now.
any ideas??

alright im off to bed.

ah get crunk wit it...
wow i have a busy ass weekend coming up. tommorrow night i leave to go to bham to do work at a womens show..i love getting hotel rooms paid for and traveling..my mah is coming with me and bringing aidan so its like a fun adventure at this point! then its back to huntsville in a hurry because the A&M homecoming is this evening so i opted to work sat and sun to make some extra ends..ah hell yeah! i should have some pretty hot cheese coming at me soon and oh thank God because you know you really do feel better when you have money in the bank..yes sir.

so i just got finished watching the nip/tuck finale. HOLY SHIT! she is man baby! and she is his daddy and mommy??! way to crazy! oh im so hooked i cant wait to see what happens next season! so much drama my excitement region of the brain is in overload! alec baldwin?? all i have to say is WTF?
now im going to run up and watch rescue me cause that is my other guilty pleasure.

right now the idea for XMAS is going to italy with the fam. i think we may actually be able to pull it off. looks like my sister has an assload of sky miles that i can use!
okay im off sorry im ditzy excuse my fallable prose. now ill update better later my little muffins.

Current Mood: fackin wee taded

Shalom Shala!
peace to all and the good tidings life is bringing you. if youve been blessed as i have then you have yummy din din, friends and family surrounding you, and shiny new things to diddle with.
i love all of yous and merry christmas damnit.

now get drunk!

Current Mood: christmasy!

and to all a goodnight...
okay so..i can hide it no longer.
*******IM IN HUNTSVILLE!!!**********
i came home and ive been here yesterday but i was justa settlin in yall!! right now im online making xmas cards..i really want to go out and see everyone..but is it really necessary everyone (LJ FOLKS) go to a damn bar?? can we not have a hip horah somewheres??
either way...call me my lovely bottoms..im only here for 2 weeks..WHO wants to come back with me for NEW YEARS??
my cell:
1.646.981.3227

spike the eggnog,
angel aka sha SHA!!

TGIF!
well, here i am ...its a beautiful fall day here in brooklyn..everything is beautiful and i am eternally happy..
i want a cat badly..the idea of a dog has been thrown out since barking is a big no no!
i still have a temporary roomate but i dont mind..its nice to have someone around when you wake up in the morning. other than that i have been working like crazy and trying to stay warm..ive talked with my family and they want me to come home for christmas just for a couple of days so i may be there in huntsville round december 24-25th..
i would like to update more but living on minimal mula and minimal technological devices not including a hairdryer is incredibly humbling and nice. so every now and then i have the chance to go and check email which i what im doing now.
so here is my update all my lovely lovely ljers i think of you often and miss you and love you and all that mushly shit...
kiss kiss..
angel

my own little jilted fairytale..
so life in new york is still beautiful. but, drama doesnt escape you even if you travel to the end of the world~ maybe tommorrow ill find my way. alas, today is at hand, and i cant wait to see what weather i will be blessed with as soon as i step out on the busy streets of brooklyn. happy october 1st everyone!
ive been working like mad..7 hours on my feet serving countless cups of cappucino, cannolis, and broccoli rabe. (pronounced rob) who knew italians ate like this?? i did! its some good stuff man, good stuff. life isnt cheap here either..its a matter of finding the hole-in-the-wall shops that jut out of endless sidewalks in the concrete jungle. everyday has been pretty simple. living on my own is really nice. i love it..im in charge of everything that happens to me [as we all are]..but for me here--"its times like these we learn to love again" like grohl says~
i am breathing deeper, loving harder, and appreciating everything more and more. for some odd reason, i feel like i need to write down everything (which i am doing in another journal) because my days are somehow growing shorter in this life of mine.

i had dreams about vampires last night~ but they approached me and a group of others in a theater setting like the demonthings in the show "dead like me"..you know those crazy things that come before someone dies?~ and the girl from underworld was the only one who could help us..and all i remember in the end is that she was such a shallow character..so underwritten. stupid. but very scary dream. if only you knew the crazy shit in my head.

right now im reading dharma bums by jack kerouac. its great. i secretly wish for the buddhist thinking, the zen lifestyle of climbing mountains and living on close to nothing. sleeping in the woods, waking up and hiking and greeting birds and bears and beasts oh my! at least then life would be more simple and i really wish for that simple simple life. maybe in my next life.
i have 2 cats here in the apartment that i love.. they are my two best friends here.
just to let you all know. im incredibly lonely and so busy being a recluse im gentle with my feelings and forgetting the fun things people seek because whats the fun for really?
i love it more than you know.

so here is my update on life in new york. its not glamourous..but its mine.

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